Re: single mom to be seeking knowledge on rights

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I am a divorced mother living in Southern California so maybe I
have a little insight to give you. CA is very much leaning
towards the direction of 50/50 parenting, however, if your ex
lives in Utah, that won't happen. What may happen is your child
at some point will have to start spending alternate holidays and
a chunk of time during the summer with his/her dad. There is no
way on this planet that the CA courts will take your child away
from you to live with the dad unless you are a terrible person,
on drugs, or whatever. As long as your ex doesn't live nearby,
you should be good. I was stuck in a situation where I was
living in the same community as my ex and the courts granted him
excessive visitation when she was 5. His visitation was 3
weekends per month and every Tuesday and Thursday after school
until 7PM. According to the courts, the split was 70% with mom
and 30% with dad. As you can tell though, my time consisted
mostly of sleeping and school hours, it was horrible. I
contacted an attorney and was told the only way out of the
situation was to go to graduate school outside of the area. So,
I am now at the end of my second year of law school and my
daughter is doing much better in school, both academically and
socially. The bottom line, you won't lose your child unless you
are mentally challenged. My reccomendation would be to focus on
your child, don't bring different men in and out of your life;
work as little as possible to show that you actually want to be
a part of your child's life, and try to keep as stable a home
life for them as possible. After all, it's not your child's
fault that you are bringing them into the world in an already
rocky situation, do what is best for the child and I am sure
everything will work out in the end. By the way, start a child
support case now, that way you will be getting it as soon as
your child is born and you won't have to worry so much about
money. There is a department of child support services in every
county and it's completely free to sign yourself up. They have
attorney's that handle everything for you.